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LGT Editing #7 (Salvage Operation)
LGT Editing #7 just had a colossal setback. I was trying to save the draft before posting like I always do, but I got a random error page that forced me to go back to the editor. The post I worked on wasn’t waiting for me there. What’s worse is I have a habit of saving my changes to the story before posting the editing segments to the blog. That means the story’s updated with the changes, but the LGT Editing details and comparisons I worked on for the last few hours are all gone. I’m pretty frustrated with WP right now and I’m trying to decide how I want to handle this. The only solutions I can think of right now are trying to restore the story to the version from this morning and then start all over again, or changing the format this one time. There’s not enough time for the former today and I’m too frustrated to do it justice.
I’m feeling cheated. You commit to something, finish all the work involved, attempt to save it to prevent the very thing that winds up happening, and bam. Inexplicable erasure. Since I can’t trust the draft saving feature 100% of the time, I’m going to need to take some extra measures going forward. This won’t be a complete waste of time. I’m going to post the summation of the changes I made without the commentary. It’s unsatisfying as hell, but it’s better than the nothing I found waiting for me after that random error.
Here’s the edited scene. Any lines that were changed in any way are bolded like usual.
“You’re hired,” Lydia’s words opened up a whole new world of possibilities for Enya. She would never forget them.
Enya was let into the estate of Duchess Lydia von Tenebrae by a servant woman. The magnificence on display made the new hire’s head spin. Libero Chapel certainly had its share of Classical Clesian splendor, but none of that held a candle to the gilded halls of a living legend. Everything was its own work of art, crafted from only the finest materials. The patterns on the marble floors erupted from the walls and converged at regular points along their path. The building’s mana conduits, so common out here in the East, were expertly and painstakingly crafted to complement their surroundings. As striking as the individual elements were, there was a warm, harmonious glow tying them all together. Enya wondered if all of it had been conceived by a single architect. If so, they were probably famous. They were also probably a faber.
Enya was escorted to an office on the first floor. She expected to find Lydia inside, maybe reading something or making progress on another one of her own. It was a good opportunity to ask for a favor, if it a bit risky. Enya brought her favorite book with her with the hope of getting it signed by the author. Even at the risk of being annoying, she would find the right moment to ask.
When the servant let her inside, Enya saw two more. The one sitting behind the desk was middle-aged with thin grayish-brown hair combed back and out of the way. His clothes were similar to the other male servants but had accents on the cuffs and near his collar that gave Enya the distinct impression he had seniority over the others. Maybe he was the one in charge of all the other servants. He was even busy looking over a document and didn’t seem to notice them coming in. That was what she expected from someone in that kind of position.
The other servant was a young man closer to Enya’s age. His chair rocked precariously back and forth as he balanced himself with his foot on a leg of the desk. Enya had seen enough people come crashing down to know how this might turn out. As if that wasn’t worrying enough, his attire was in total disarray. His coat was wide open, his shirt was mostly untucked, and he was rocking himself in that chair with a pair of old gym shoes. Enya was beginning to suspect her arrival was the last step in a series of moves to get rid of this lout. Why else would he be sitting in this luxurious office if not to be formally let go? What else could those documents be but damning reports about him?
“Master Wheeler,” the woman escorting Enya spoke softly, “This is Enya Ward. She’s the new hire you were expecting today.”
“H-hello,” Enya stammered, acutely aware she was no longer a spectator. “I’m Enya Ward. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
The middle-aged man smiled and stood up from the desk. “Good day. I am Irving Wheeler, Master of Mistress Lydia’s Golden Treasury. No need to be nervous.”
“So she’s the new one?” The young man didn’t get up, he merely craned his neck around for a better view. He was far from impressed. “Looks like a broom pusher,” he shrugged.
Enya grit her teeth. He wasn’t completely wrong, but she and her family were groundskeepers for the Libero Chapel. Not mere ‘broom pushers.’ A groundskeeper’s work came with pride and diligence. And who was he to talk about her that way? If he didn’t look so proud of himself, Enya was sure she could crush him flat with a few scathing remarks of her own. There was nothing for it, though. She was here for her sake, not to get into a squabble with a scruffy boy who wouldn’t even be here tomorrow.
As Enya’s escort left, Irving stepped around the desk and approached her with an open hand. “Ms. Ward, from now on, you will be working here on the grounds. Since today is your first day, consider it an orientation.”
“I’m happy to be here, Master Wheeler,” Enya shook his hand, “I promise I’ll do my very best.”
“Hmm. Quite the contrast,” Wheeler shot a weary glance at his other subordinate. “Todd, get up and introduce yourself.”
With a sigh, the irreverent Todd stood up and turned to face them. That was when Enya noticed a small stain on his shirt. As if Todd wasn’t off-putting enough, already. It was faint but it may have been a tea stain. Coffee maybe? Both seemed almost too refined for him.
“Todd Brace,” he introduced himself, “We’re in the same boat so you can take it easy.
Enya winced. The thought of ‘taking it easy’ was offensive enough on its own; she couldn’t afford that luxury back home. Hearing it from a boy with a stained, untucked shirt almost felt like a test of some kind.
“Trust me,” Todd said, apparently sensing Enya’s doubts, “the job’s not hard. Lydia just needs people she can trust to keep all her stuff organized. She loans out items, we get’em prepped. They come back, we put’em away. Easy work, easy money.”
As vague as all of that sounded, Enya got a surprising amount of information out of it. Her first impression of Todd was still an unmitigated disaster, but she was ready to forgive and forget. Todd hadn’t mentioned any custodian work, but Enya had her own suspicions about that. The boy couldn’t keep himself together, so he obviously weaseled his way out of any real work that needed doing. She was different; always attentive, always alert, always accommodating. That had to be one of the reasons Enya was chosen over so many other applicants at the university. That and they clearly needed someone more presentable working alongside Irving.
“I suppose that is one way of looking at it,” Irving shrugged faintly. He started out of the office and beckoned Todd and Enya. “Let’s head down and show you around the world’s largest private inventory.”
“Lead the way, Master Wheeler,” Enya said, happy to forget Todd and follow Irving.
I don’t know when I’m going to do LGT Editing #8 but it will likely be on a Friday or a Sunday. After that there won’t be any more of these until after I finish Chapter 2. #7 was looking to be more useful than most of the other sessions so far, but now it’s turned into one of the least useful. The format I use is important for highlighting the differences in the way a line reads and the explanations were far more instructive than I expected them to be when I first started doing these. #7 is basically just here for continuity, now. To say I’m disappointed with how things turned out today would be an understatement. Live and learn.
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