by Phoenix | Aug 27, 2021 | WoWs
I was pleasantly surprised when this dev blog post showed up in my clan’s Discord server.
VIII AUGUST VON PARSEVAL, X MANFRED VON RICHTHOFEN, VIII GRAF ZEPPELIN and VIII GRAF ZEPPELIN B
- Changed parameters of bombers:
- Increased the chance of hitting two bombs at once in the internal dispersion ellipse.
X FRANKLIN D. ROOSEVELT
- Changed parameters of torpedo bombers:
- Torpedo Arming Distance increased from 517 to 545 m;
- Torpedo spread width increased by 5%;
- Changed parameters of bombers:
- Maximum Bomb Damage decreased from 11,200 to 10,600;
- HE Bomb Armor Penetration Capacity decreased from 67 to 64 mm;
- Chances of HE Bombs Causing a Fire on Target decreased from 64% to 60%.
X ALEXANDER NEVSKY
- Changed the “Repair party” consumable:
- Restoration of hit points after receiving damage to the citadel increased from 10% to 33%.
Graf Zeppelin is one of my favorite CVs in the game, but her dive bombers are mind-shatteringly inaccurate. Her bombs can disperse from each other at 40 degree angles on release. I’ve never seen such pacifistic ordnance before; it’s insane. Even so, my clanmates have known me to bash MVR’s AP bombers and constantly pointing out how I have an easier time getting citadels with Graf Zeppelin’s bombers than with MVR’s. I think that comes down to the way the planes attack. GZ’s bombers don’t climb first, so overall they have the superior approach for hit and runs. They just swoop down and that gives you better lead and timing on the drop. The dispersion ruins everything, but it’s easier to score both hits once you get used to it. Exploiting the large superstructures of some ships can sometimes net you citadels. I’ve even smacked DDs with both bombs on occasion. MVR’s bombers take way too long to drop, so unless you have enough buffer planes to buy time, you’re going to have to drop a little too early. That’s when you get multiple misses and overpens. It’s frustrating at the best of times, so I’m looking forward to testing out the German CVs with the updated dispersion when this update goes live.
As for FDR, she needs the nerfs to account for those tanky planes, but I’m not really sure where you’d draw the line. The most expensive ship in the game should still be the most coveted, if not the most effective at whatever her particular niche is. Otherwise, what’s the point? FDR should be better than most CVs, but I’m not sure how much better. A little off topic, but I think Shikishima should also be more effective than most BBs, though that particular ship set sail quite a while ago. The Yamato hull is a little too easy to exploit, so it’s a good thing the secondary niche isn’t quite dead on her yet.
I don’t really care about the Nevsky to be honest. I don’t dislike the ship or anything, I just don’t play Russian cruisers as a whole. Bug fixes are always a good thing (I heard this was a bug and not just a balance change), so let’s just move on.
I really wish I could see what’s going on inside the Wargaming company itself right about now. It definitely doesn’t feel like they’re a centralized whole all moving in the same direction. That’s almost never the case inside a large company. There are a lot of changes being lined up for the game that are great, even if they take about eight times as long to implement as you’d expect. Let’s not forget WG’s MVPs, the Art Department, or whichever heretics in the gameplay sector that suggested buffing secondaries and stuck to their guns. Even so, the company is driving older players away and just focusing on milking the newer ones. That’s why so many people now, myself included, are either hesitant or straight up unwilling to spend anymore money on the game. (They have enough already; let’s be honest)
Voting with your wallet is actually pretty ineffective when new players that don’t know any better–or equally as likely don’t care–can just about make up the difference over time. That’s why WG just keeps putting out ads and campaigns like nothing’s wrong and only addresses community concerns on the forums or in other places that are nice and tucked away out of sight. It’s irritating but that’s exactly what they should be doing while trying to fix their own mess. The issue is giving players bits and pieces of what they’ve been requesting for ages while avoiding the lootbox issue and the horrific PR management. Shonai said they weren’t going to just talk, but actually take action on the issues, but I’m worried that by the time they decide on what to do, we’ll have moved onto the next big problem. Anything they do about the lootboxes will be too little too late. There’s a vicious cycle forming here.
About Black Friday and Collaborations
I want to talk about Black Friday and WoWs collaborations since we’re in the middle of Wargaming’s biggest mud bath that I’ve seen, at least. I’ve only been playing for a year, so I wouldn’t dare call myself an old player; the game’s six years old. In a previous post I said I’m not spending anymore on the game until the situation improves. That’s not concrete enough of a statement so I’m going to clarify my position as well as outline some exceptions I’m making. My average amount spent on WoWs since I started playing was about $50 a month. It spiked during certain collabs or events like Black Friday and plummeted when nothing interesting was going on. It all still averages out to about $50 monthly. That stops … last month.
I’ll explain that in detail but first, the reason I’m drawing a line between not spending anything at all and spending freely like I used to is because part of what got me into this game was the ship collection aspect of it. I’m directly taking away half of my own enjoyment of the game to join in a community-wide statement to Wargaming. I think it’s the right thing to do, but it’s also going to come back to bite me later if I become an absolutist about it. There’s a difference between WG ruining WoWs for me and me ruining it for myself. I’m making two exceptions to my ‘don’t spend anything on WG’ stance right here for the record, both so I can do what I feel is right but also not throw away opportunities I’ve been waiting on for as long as I’ve been playing the game.
Do you think exceptions are a bad thing? Well just keep in mind that Wargaming isn’t factoring the spending habits of specific players into their decisions, they’re adding up totals over time and carefully watching trends. Revenue going up during events is what inclines game companies to do more events more often, so that’s another form of feedback you can give them if it doesn’t go against your principles. Now for those exceptions.
Black Friday
This is entirely about the Enterprise and the potential Enterprise B. Both the Enterprise and the Jean Bart were removed from the premium shop before I had the chance to get either of them. The Jean Bart B is a Black Friday version of the Jean Bart that I bought last year during the event. She’s one of my favorite ships, so I’m glad I had that alternative. There is no Enterprise B at the time of this writing, however, if, and only if Wargaming puts up an Enteprise B for this upcoming Black Friday will I buy anything from them at all.
The last Black Friday event bundled the whole collection of ships for that year and the previous for people who want them all and/or the flags and patches for each ship, but whether I get a bundle or something is still up in the air. It’s unlikely since I don’t get bundles unless there are at least two ships I want in them (and I have an embarrassing number of B variants already). Since I can’t think of any other ships besides Enterprise B I’d really want that could be bundled with her, I won’t hold my breath. They’ve only done Tier 7s up to Tier 9s from what I can tell, so the list of premiums (and more importantly the list of premiums I care to get) is getting very small. Mainz B? Eh. Wake me when Loewenhardt B is a thing. Black Stukas would be hard to pass up.
So to summarize, if there is no Enterprise B during this upcoming Black Friday event, I’m not spending one cent. If there is, I will buy it, and most likely separately.
Collaborations
There have been a few collaborations that have gotten me some ships and commanders I really wanted, and when they do reruns I like to pick up characters I missed or buy the odd bundle here and there. It just depends on the collab, but I actually skip most of them. The WH40k and Transformer events didn’t interest me at all for example. The current Legend of Galactic Heroes does somewhat, but it’s not a collab I’d make an exception for. Something like an Arpeggio of Blue Steel collaboration is a better fit for me. Since submarines are in the latter half of their testing and will be released relatively soon, I’m hoping I-401 among others will show up in the next ARP collab after they’re released. It’s just a vague hope, but some of the data for one of the subs is already in the game. It shouldn’t surprise anyone if that happens.
So to summarize here, if there’s an Arpeggio event or something else over the target, I will buy what I want from it.
I’m making these two exceptions so that I don’t wind up chasing myself from the game over regrets that are entirely my own fault. It’s not my fault I couldn’t get Enterprise or Jean Bart. It’s 100% my fault if I don’t get a hypothetical Enterprise B. You could argue that WG’s mismanagement is a perfectly good reason to jump ship right now, and you’d be right, but I actually like this game. My enjoyment of it is only hindered by a couple of things. What it’s really lacking are more game modes and missions to get higher tier ships without having to pay money for them. Even so, there’s nothing else quite like it. I’d like to see it improve and I want to be there to experience that upward trend if it happens. The game balance is improving in some areas and falling apart in others, but one thing that’s remained constant is my ability to pick up certain ships I want and learn how best to play them. I’ve wanted Enterprise from the very beginning, but it’s never been possible. So, to avoid shoot myself in the foot just to spite WG, I will buy the ship if an opportunity presents itself, be that Black Friday, or some other avenue. No matter what else is going on, that ship in particular is an exception worth making.
… I’m just praying they don’t change up the Black Friday event to make the lootboxes some kind of requirement, otherwise I’m rioting with everyone else ….
by Phoenix | Aug 25, 2021 | Editing, LGT
Before I move onto the previous scene, I want to do one last pass on the final scene and clean it up a bit more. Just a few things I noticed while skimming the section again. I guess an editor’s work is never done.
Anyway, some rapid-fire edits.
“Wow, did you really forget?” Todd shook his head, “I guess that armor still works then.” >>> “Did you really forget?” Todd shook his head, “I guess that armor does still work.”
She came right up to the girl and placed her hands on her shoulders. >>> She came up to the girl and placed her hands on her shoulders.
“Unfortunately, we can’t answer that,” Irving said >>> “I’m afraid we won’t be answering that,” Irving said
“You seriously don’t remember?” Todd cocked his head at her, “You said it was the right thing to do just a few minutes ago.” >>> Todd cocked his head at her, “You said it was the right thing to do a second ago.”
“That does sound like me,” Enya admitted. >>> Enya had to admit, that did sound like her.
Lydia nodded before addressing the real issue. >>> Lydia nodded, and then she addressed the real problem.
It turned out to be the right decision. >>> It turned out to be the right choice.
Okay now we can move onto the previous scene without any distractions.
The last line is as follows.
Enya put on the helmet and a bright light blinded her, and all she knew for certain was that the armor’s power was fully active.
This part can easily be touched up. I also want it to hit a bit harder and flow better since this is basically the last stop before the reader has the crux of this story driven home. There’s no big fight scene or epic confrontation that follows on the next page. Whatever Enya did, it’s a tale for another time. Yeah, I’m missing that mystic, already.
As soon as Enya put on the helmet, a brilliant light swallowed her up. All she knew for certain was that the Armor of the Unburdened was no mere relic.
Let’s try this version for now. I’m trying to better evoke the sense of being on the receiving end of the contract, rather than just hearing about it from Irving.
This paragraph turned out pretty well when I first wrote it, but there’s one part that feels stilted, so I’m going to try to improve it.
All that was left was the helmet. Enya held it in both hands and glanced briefly at the armor’s case. >>> The helmet was the sole remaining piece. Enya held it in front of her and glanced at the armor’s case.
There might be more that needs doing but this feels better.
Next.
Another tremor came, but there was no loud blast accompanying it. Enya looked up and saw dust falling from overhead.
Clean up operation.
Another tremor came, and with it dust began to fall from the ceiling. Enya was transfixed by the streams overhead.
I don’t think the lack of a blasting sound needs mentioning here. If there was another one, it’s a safe bet I would have noted it. The tremor’s what counts, so I decided to roll everything up together like so. There’s an even better version of this out there in the aether somewhere. I can feel it, but today’s not the day it’s going to come to me.
This next one’s too important to leave alone, and two parts at the beginning are bothering me.
Just then, the armor began to glow, bracer and all. Enya was about to take off the bracer, but it suddenly shrunk down around her arm until it fit perfectly. Now she understood the reason. Anyone who was willing to wear the armor could wear it. It was just that simple. She wasn’t irrelevant just yet. She could help them. Enya might get in trouble, but she would regret it if she sat here doing nothing with such a powerful artifact while someone nearby was hurt or killed.
I’m going to fix up the first two sentences so they fit together better and also do a general clean up operation.
Suddenly, the armor began to glow. Enya would have slipped off the bracer on reflex, had it not shrunk down around her arm until the fit was perfect. Now she understood King Mnemos encounter with the armor. Anyone who was willing to wear it could wear it. It was just that simple. Enya knew she would probably be in trouble for trying to help, but she would regret it if she stood here with such a powerful artifact, and did nothing while others were getting hurt.
On top of fixing the first two parts I also really needed to omit the part about someone possibly being killed. Enya’s background kept her far away from unnatural deaths like lethal accidents and murders, so the thought of someone being killed wouldn’t cross her mind before actually seeing the danger firsthand. Worldly innocence, let’s call it. Anyway, I like this version. Moving on.
guantlet >>> gauntlet
You’re never done hunting down typos, either.
One of my favorite parts here, where Enya figures out that the armor’s size should have been an issue, but apparently wasn’t for the then fourteen year old King Mnemos.
Something didn’t feel right all of a sudden. Enya looked up past the inscriptions toward the armor. She couldn’t see it, but she remembered clearly just how big it was. How could a fourteen year old boy put on something like that? And yet the song was clear about what happened. A fourteen year old somehow managed. “Donning the armor shall seal the pact, for power, for courage, and every need.” Maybe the armor would take care of the fitting issue. If it could handle every need, then surely it could handle that.
A general clean up operation’s in order.
Something didn’t feel right about all of this. Enya looked up past the inscriptions, but couldn’t see the armor from where she was. She remembered just how large it was. How could a fourteen year old boy do it? Extra padding certainly wasn’t the answer, and yet Irving’s song was clear about what happened. A fourteen year old managed with this very set of armor. “Donning the armor shall seal the pact, for power, for courage, and every need,” Enya recited the verse. Maybe the armor would take care of the fitting issue. If it could handle every need, then it could probably handle that.
My edits rarely turn out longer than the original versions, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. I honestly feel that my stories can be a bit too dialogue biased, so this is fine.
Next up is the realization.
Fourteen. >>> Fourteen. Fourteen?
This will fit better in a moment.
“A curse was upon me, my fear took hold, he dared not make war at fourteen years old. The Mystic, he soothed me … with tales of the bold …”
There’s one too many ellipses in this line, so I’ll change things up to stay more to the point and cut down on those.
“A curse was upon me, my fear took hold, he dared not make war at fourteen years old …” Enya trailed off into a soft hum as a certain word tugged at her thoughts.
It’s not much but it adds up over the course of a read.
“What then? Put everything back and then go right back to waiting? What if they’re in danger? What if Todd had the right idea after all?”
This is fine, but I’m not going to pass up a chance to better distinguish my characters from each other. Everyone’s got a special way of speaking, and while there’s always going to some overlap, I can keep it basic.
“What now? Just put everything back and wait here? What if they’re in danger? What if Todd was right?”
Like so. That’s more fitting for Enya.
On that same line we’ve got this.
Joke or not, things were almost certainly getting dangerous for them. Enya wanted to help and not just stand there, but it was all starting to seem pointless.
Clean up operation.
Whether he was joking or not, the situation was dangerous. Enya wanted to help, not fret back here by the armor. There didn’t seem to be anything she could do, though.
Next up is …
That noise and the accompanying tremor were serious. Irving made it clear this wasn’t a normal occurrence in the Golden Treasury. Enya couldn’t do much, but maybe she should try to find some way to help.
That last part needs some work. I’m thinking Enya’s helplessness, while not understated, is coming up too often. That’s a feeling that should creep in over time and not come up directly more than twice.
That noise and the accompanying tremor were worrisome. Irving made it clear the situation in the treasury wasn’t normal.
Not perfect, but better.
This part could honestly stay, but,
It would never fit her.
would also work as,
It would slide off her arm at the slightest push.
I’m also thinking of tacking the dialogue portions onto the ends of the preceding paragraphs. It’s cleaner and I don’t have any particular reasons for those line breaks. It’ll look something like this.
She was still alone, and Enya was starting to wonder if she would be here like this all day. Whatever that Sulan machine was, it was keeping everyone else occupied. Maybe something bad was happening and being stuck here would keep her from ever knowing about it or being able to help. Her grip on the bracer tightened as the thought nagged at her. “What should I do?”
The thought occurred to her once: put on the bracer, but she could tell at a glance the armor was forged for someone more than twice her size. It would slide off her arm at the slightest push. She was just about to put the bracer back onto the case when the ground shook. A noise almost like an explosion and a short tremor nearly brought her to her knees. “What was that?!”
The next segment could also use some work. I tend to leave extra details as separate, brief sentences, either to keep the sentences in the paragraph inconsistent with each other length-wise, or until I can find a better way to bring those descriptions into preexisting descriptions.
Ten minutes later, Enya found herself inspecting the armor. Just like in Irving’s song, every forged part of it was golden. The years had taken their toll. The luster was long gone and the armor looked almost fragile somehow. Curious, Enya carefully reached out with her finger and lightly tapped one of the armor’s bracers. Nothing happened, but she was less worried about damaging the armor. She carefully picked up a bracer, surprised by its weight at first. The armored glove came with it, and Enya held them up to get a better look at them.
So we’ll try this.
Ten minutes later, Enya found herself inspecting the armor. Centuries of mere existence had done their worst; the luster was long gone and the large plates seemed almost fragile somehow. Despite the toll of time, the armor had come right out of Irving’s song. Curious, Enya carefully reached out with her finger and lightly tapped one of the bracers. Thankfully nothing happened. She was caught of guard by the bracer’s light weight when she picked it up. The armored glove came with it, and Enya carefully inspected them.
Behold the shuffling!
Nearing the start of the scene we’ve got some comparisons to Libero which are important for that slow trickle of info about Enya’s old life into the story.
“What’s going on?” She was used to spending time by herself at Libero Chapel, but this was markedly different. For one, her job was never to simply stand around. She should have at least been tidying up anything that looked out of place. The only thing out of place right now was the Armor of the Unburdened and its large, glowing inscription-covered case. Todd hadn’t done his part yet, so Enya wasn’t inclined to try moving the case back.
Before I go on, there’s also the preceding line.
Minutes passed and neither Irving nor Todd returned. There were no new announcements, and no one else had come through the area. Enya was all alone.
I want to combine these two paragraphs. There’s not a lot of reason to separate them, especially since I’m taking out Enya’s quip.
Minutes passed and neither Irving nor Todd returned. There were no new announcements over the intercom, and no one else had come through the area. Enya was all alone. She was used to spending time by herself in Libero Chapel, but the Golden Treasury was a completely foreign place to her. Having to simply stand by only made matters worse for her. Enya’s job as a groundskeeper was never to be idle. She should have at least been tidying up anything that looked out of place. Her only option was the Armor of the Unburdened and its large, glowing inscription-covered case. Todd hadn’t done his part yet, so Enya wasn’t inclined to try moving it.
The paragraph isn’t too long, so this should work, and I even ditched some unnecessary dialogue.
This next line is the first of the scene and the last of LGT Editing #3. So far so good.
Looking more closely at the armor’s case, Enya tried to make out the words again. It was completely foreign, and yet somehow Todd understood it. Todd, the same boy who couldn’t keep his appearance together or show due deference to his superiors could still read and write circles around her. Enya shook off the disappointment as hard as she could. “You have your job, now focus.”
Let me run one more clean up operation.
Looking more closely at the armor’s case, Enya tried to make out the words again. It was completely foreign, and yet somehow Todd understood it. Todd, the same boy who couldn’t keep his appearance together or show due deference to his superiors could still read and write circles around her. Enya shook off the disappointment as hard as she could. “You have your job, now focus.”
You and me both, sister. Alright, it’s not perfect, but once again, it’s better.
Looking more closely, Enya tried to make out the inscriptions on the case again. It was completely foreign, and yet Todd, of all people, understood it. This was the same boy who couldn’t keep his appearance together or show due deference to save his life, and yet he could still read and write circles around her. Enya tried to shake off her disappointment. “You have your job, now focus.”
With that, we’re finished with this editing session.
I’m surprised I managed to finish it today, but I caught a lucky-ish break, so here it is, on schedule, despite me, despite the site, despite the internet, despite everything.
Session #2 – Session #4
